So starts the Hep C Diaries...
Monday is THE day. 1pm. Life will change. After much anguish and what seems a lifetime of psychological torture, I will be starting the treatment for Hep C that I have been contemplating for 12 years. After 24 weeks, freedom is mine!!
I should be cleaning my house right now while my kids and husband aren't home so that this weekend (the last normal one for months) can be spent having fun with them instead of on domestic duties but I'm not. That would make it more real and as ridiculous as it sounds I am still a bit in denial...I am afraid. Who knows how I am going to respond to the drugs? Will I be really sick? Will they work? What if I am one of those people that....(insert any number of VERY scary situations)? Will I still be able to be a good Mom? A good wife? How am I gonna be able to take care of everyone else when I feel awful? What if I don't feel bad? Does that mean that the drugs aren't working? What if? What if? What if? Like a broken record in my head that I try not to let play. As much as it has been scary having Hep C all my life, it has been my normal. Normal is about to change. I think I will be freaked until the first shot is done. Right now it is like waiting to go into labour with your first child. You are intimidated and you don't know how it will feel and how you will handle it. Once you're into it though, you realize you are ok and can manage it. Once I experience what it does to me, I will be better prepared to keep going. I'm thinking Tylenol will be my best friend!! It also helps that my Mom will be here with me for the first couple of shots and Moms always make everything better!
I think I will like this blog thing and will be back! Must go get the kids!
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It's your first blog post and a GREAT place to journal everything! You can look back at this one day and see all that you went through to get to where you are!! :o)
ReplyDeleteHUGS!! Thinking about you lot's!!
Dawn.
wow, this is awesome for you, Ibbob! You used to keep your thoughts in piles and piles of notebooks when you were younger... remember! Now you are older and mature.... this will be a tool to help you deal with thoughts, emotions and to hear others words of encouragement. Much more productive than your silly notebooks! Just think in 24 weeks your world will be better..... WILL!! Think good thoughts during this process and lean on others if you need it!! I will watch for new blogs!! Shaina
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